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Re: [RC] buddy problem(long) - GoTory

Hi Rene-
   At first I thought maybe MY riding partner had written this, but as the 
post continued I realized I didnt have to take it personally!
   Our styles are very different in many respects, but similar in others, 
and I've benefitted greatly from that. She's the organized, methodical one, 
I've 
been able to be less so because of her.  She has things prepared and packed, 
I throw it in and hope I've got what I need or can make do without it.  She 
owns the truck, we bought the trailer together because the one we wanted was 
more than either of us could handle financially alone.    We've learned that 
our 
horses can get along fine in camp but do much better alone in any kind of 
competitive ride. We'll often trailer some place to condition and then split 
up, 
because they do better at their own pace than fighting to keep up or hold 
back... easy trail rides from home we'll often go together, as we all enjoy 
each 
other's company.
   We have different feeding/supplementing issues- and that's the way it 
should be - as we have DIFFERENT horses.  The mare I recently lost due to an 
accident was an easy keeper, and while a faster walker, a slower finisher, than 
hers.  Her horse has a lot more experience on rides and trails and, although a 
little more challenging to keep the weight on, finishes faster and in better 
shape than mine did.  He will be "baby-sitting" the new project horse- I 
HOPE!!- 
but *only* when it works for him... we're at completely different ends of the 
spectrum right now- and that's the way it should be.
   One of the things I've had to re-learn -again and again- is that just 
because I'm commited to doing things one way, doesn't mean someone else is 
wrong 
to do it another way... Your riding buddy must be doing some things right if 
her horse is finishing well... On the other hand, she may need to have some 
kind of  problem with her horse at a ride  before she's open to hearing 
recommendations for a change in her approach... 
   For you, though, I have to agree with a previous poster- if you're not 
having fun then things have to change.  Can you agree to disagree?  And PLAN to 
ride a different ride from each other?  It's a whole different ride- and a 
much more satisfying one, I've found- to be WITH your horse, instead of with 
another RIDER!!
   Caveat- I've only been back in the horse world for about 7 years,after a 
quarter century hiatus, and have only had the pleasure of riding LD for about 
the last 3 or 4 years, so don't have much experience on that side of the 
books. So take this for what it's worth.  Good luck- and if you find a good 
solution, let us know!        nikki

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