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FW: [RC] story, cow in the road - Mike Sherrell

Didn't you get to eat the cow?
 

Regards,

Mike Sherrell
Grizzly Analytical
707 887 2919; fax 707 887 9834
www.grizzlyanalytical.com

-----Original Message-----
From: ridecamp-owner@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx [mailto:ridecamp-owner@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx]On Behalf Of april
Sent: Wednesday, September 05, 2007 9:10 AM
To: ridecamp@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Cc: dodie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [RC] story, cow in the road

Good morning, such as it is. I am no writer, but inspired by Dodie, here it goes.
I got to the pillow around 6 am. That in its self is another story that I am not going into at this time.
7:30- DH wakes me up to ask ,"Where is the deposit for the bank?" ummm..... that would be the one that HAS to go in the bank this morning. The one on top of my purse in the middle of the kitchen table.
7:35- "Do we have any envelopes?"
7:35.5  my blue heeler x dalmation mix hides under the falling covers as the spare pillow follows DH out the bedroom door, as hard as I can throw it in my sleep
8:30- Hubby returns to the bedroom  "GET UP! CAN YOU HALTER A COW?!?" 
Now, he knows you can halter cows. He means can I personally get a halter on one. We live on a dead end road just a little off a real road. Two lanes of heavy traffic and 3 bridges with no sides at all, just steep canal type ditches, dry or full, crash or drowned if you go off. Several badly placed hills. Some body wrecked a motorcycle a couple years ago and got in the kudzu. By morning the kudzu had covered him and they didn't find him for 4 months. Weeeeeellllll............ there is a cow ..............
8:31- grab yesterdays jeans, socks, shoes, tell DH which ropes to grab while I grab a bucket of feed, jump in the little saturn, and away we go, notice there is no bra or shirt in this list, OMG yes I ran out of the house in the tshirt I was sleeping in, Ladies, don't ever do it!! take the time.
 
So hubby has already call 911 to tell them there is a white cow in the road. Now when you dial 911 here, you get Memphis, TN and we are in the country south of there in MS.   um.... We are pretty sure they didn't believe him.
 
This cow- very pretty, well fed, a beef cow but she has a calf somewhere from the bag on her- is running amok on the road and oviously not only is Freaked Out, but has never seen a bucket of feed before and is very aware of what the rope is an we ain't getting it on her. Did yall know cows are fast? So here am I joggin up the narrow road with my morning hair, in my pj tshirt with my 38DDs, no bra, a 35ft purple rope, a short rope, halter, and a bucket of feed, trying not to get hit. Trying to keep the cow on the side of the road, stop her, call the cops again to get somebody out here before somebody hits the cow and dies, while telling the nice people to call the cops too cause it is obious they don't believe me that there is a cow in the road and it is not even my cow!!!! I don't want to talk about the guys who didn't want to help catch her but did slow down and watch me trying, member, no bra. 
9:30- a young patrole officer finally shows up, he is afraid of the cow, lol
Two "good ole boy" animal control officers in a pick up truck who also have no idea what to do with anything bigger than a dog but enjoyed watching me herd the cow up the road, and about an hour later and we managed to run her up the road, up a driveway, and into a horse pasture whose owner was contacted by way of the realestate agents number listed on the sign in front.  The animal control and the cop parked the patrol car and their pickup where I told them, and took up positions to keep her from going back up or down, I pushed her into the driveway where the stallion pastured on one side actually herded her the rest of the way up and threw the open pasture gate opposite him. (this would be the horse part of the story) Any body who wants to breed some working stock, this boy was fine! I drive past him all the time but never got to meet him before. Made bouncing my way 1.5 miles up the road in front of all my neighbors almost actually worth it.
ITS NOT EVEN MY COW ! hmmm, so I humiliated myself this morning but nobody died, and somebody would have.
And now I can't go back to bed.
Hope yall are having better mornings.
Hey Dodie, this is for all the great stories you have told!! Hope you liked it.
april
byhalia, the middle of nowhere MS