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Re: [RC] What does "bonding" with a horse mean to you? - christabas"Bonding" to me is learning to trust each other. My horse is just now starting to trust me, and I him (I've had him a year.) I trust him to get me from here to there, and to do it without spooking and refusing and acting stupid, but until recently I did not trust his judgement. I felt that I always knew best, and his refusals were "stubborness".
Well, I asked him to cross a muddy area near a stream and he absolutely refused. Not just a mild refusal, but a rear up and jump back ward NO-way-am-I-setting-foot-in-that refusal. I got off to lead him over (not what I would usually do, but in this case I felt it was safer, and he WAS going to cross it, like it or not!) When I stepped into the mud I sunk up to my knee...it was a boggy mess, and only by yelling at him to back up and letting him pull me out by the reins did I get out! I should have trusted his judgement, and I didn't. Now I am learning to listen to him and judge when he is trying to tell me something other than "I don't want to." He, in turn, is learning to trust me. When he gives me the "I'm not sure about this" refusal, he is beginning to listen when I encourage him and tell him its okay. He is starting to trust me to to lead and to not ask him to do anything that will hurt him (unless I don't know any better, as in the above example!).
To me, that is "bonding"...trusting and depending on each other.
Christa
-----Original Message----- From: Susan Favro <susan@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> To: AERCMembersForum@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx; PNER@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx; ridecamp@xxxxxxxxxxxxx Sent: Fri, 13 Jan 2006 23:05:46 -0700 Subject: [RC] What does "bonding" with a horse mean to you? I was talking with a trainer friend of mine this evening and we got to talking about the different buzz words that clinicians are using these days. One term that came up was the word "bonding." The more we discussed it the more we realized that even between just the two of us, there was a lot of variation on what our picture was of the relationship between a bonded human and their horse. It was a fun and enlightening discussion.
So what's your take on it? If your horse is well trained and responds to you, is that bonded? Or is it that the horse runs across the pasture when you come into view? Is it leadership on your part? Or is it submission on the horse's part? Or is it because you feel like you and your horse are a "herd of two"? Does it mean your horse will be more human-like and you will be more horse-like? Is it the same type of relationship you have with a dog?
Assuming there are a variety of folks on Ride Camp, PNER and AERC who may belong to one but not the other forums, I'm going to post this on all three forums.
.S
Susan Favro Healthy As A Horse Network "Innovative effective products for the conscientious horse owner" Voice - 406.864.8000 Fax - 559.272.6093 E-mail - Susan@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Online - www.HealthyAsAHorse.Net
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