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[RC] Treatment for Broken Ribs - Bruce Weary DC

I prescribe the following for uncomplicated rib fracture:
Tincture of time.
One rib belt.
One belt of scotch.
12 oz. of Corona, to be taken internally, every four hours. For medicinal purposes only. Keep out of reach of children.
One very understanding wife to bring me the TV remote and fluff my pillow. (Be careful not to abuse her services. You'll pay dearly later.)
One week on the beach. Continue dosages of Corona, even though you may be feeling better. It's always important to finish your medication.
Daily walks with horse in hand may help with recovery of mental attitude. Symptoms of withdrawal from not riding may be lessened with judicious use of the mechanical horse at Safeway. Helmet should still be worn for safety, however. Respectfully Submitted, Dr. Quackenbush















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