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[RC] Be Careful Reading This One - Howard Bramhall

Nifty, nifty
Look who's fifty.....
haha.  The joke is on me, for it is I who have hit the JACKPOT!!!!!!  The lottery winner will please step forward or the prize will be passed on to another.
Wow!  What can I say?  The maturity of a teenager in a 50 year old man!  Can you imagine?  Is this really true?
As my ole buddy, Hunter Thompson writes, truth can often surpass fiction.  No one believes it, nobody thinks it's for real, but, if you write what is really real, than, it just might be, even if you are the only one who knows that it is.
"So, after half a century living on this planet, how does it feel?"  This is a question posed to me by one of my younger relations (a 15 year old female second cousin, twice removed).  Do I take this question seriously, or, do I have another drink and make something up?  Actually, since I haven't had all that much time to think about it, I do so now.
.......tick, tick, tick, goes the clock.......
There has to be a final purpose to one's life.  A higher calling.  Something that is either spiritual, philosophical, or on a higher plane that only the afterlife, or something damn close to it (like turning 50), can provide. And, I think I have found it.  By golly, it really is there, and, if it weren't for just one or two lucky turns in my life, I think I might have missed it completely.
I did find it.  Found it when I was 23, lost it for quite awhile, then found it once again, when I hit 35, and it's with me now.  There is life out there, life that we do not understand, a spirit...... a creature, from another world.  Something that is not us, that never will be, not even close, but, we, somehow, find a way to make a connection, and, when it clicks, it becomes who we are.
This creature is, of course, the horse.  He/she is not anything closely related to what we are, what we have become, but, it is what we want to be a part of, it is our connection to what we used to be.  I know I'm not alone here.  You feel it too.  The only difference is, you're not 50.  At least not today, for this one is mine, and I'm taking it all the way to the end of the earth.  For at least the next couple of hours, anyway.
I'm sorry.  I make no sense tonight.  I'm a bit drunk!  I don't get that way often, even though I drink just about all the time.  But, hey, you only turn 50 once in a lifetime, so, if you don't talk about it now, when will you?
This sport has become my life!  Ya'll have become so much a part of it, I just wanted to say, that I really do love all of you.  Even, those of you who really piss me off (Heidi; sorry, jk).  Really, I do.  And, you know, if I were to die today, on my birthday (I almost did; Dance Line and I went riding and got caught up in a hellacious thunderstorm) do you know whom I'd love to have speak for me, in front of my Mom, my Dad, my kids?  To say what a sorry ass I was, what a sorry ass I became, but, a sorry ass who just might be missed, by a few of ya?
That woman from North Georgia!!!!  Yea, I know, freaks me out too.  But, she is so darn funny. As much as I tried to avoid her at the convention, I ended up at that banquet dinner, the final event culminating that magical week-end, and there she was.  Surprise!!!! Susan K. told me I laughed more, at that woman's humor that night, than anyone else in the room.  I couldn't help myself.
Can you just imagine, what she would say about me at my funeral?  I mean, her Florida jokes alone are enough to put a Floridian six feet under, but, if she actually took the time to talk about me, after I'm gone, you'd be running to the bathroom so quickly, to save yourself from embarrassment, because you'd have to pee so bad, from laughing so darn hard.  haha.   Please, don't hold back.  Let it all out.  We know you have something to say.  As I say to my horses all the time, "It's a good boy who pee's.  Good boy, goooood boy!"
Life is a hoot!!!!! Of that, there is no doubt.  I don't know where I'm going, where I'll end up, but, when I get there, all I know, is I want to end up in the endurance TOP TEN so I can check my weight, with tack (and, completely full water bottles) to see if I really measure up to hang around ya'll.  
OK, sorry, this might not be completely endurance related (it is to me).  Ya'll are my other family.  The ones I can't explain to some of those who have the same last name as myself, those family members who don't ride horses.  They just don't understand. 
There's no doubt, in my mind, we are one huge, dysfunctional family.  But, to keep things going, for the sake of the horses and humans who do this sport, we must stay together.  No matter what!  It has to be us who keeps this family together.  Through thick or thin, till the bitter end, our inner strength, will be what wins. 
Howard (the old fart who is no longer 49)