sponge off

[tjones@COINET.COM (Todd & Toni Jones)]

Grand Champion Sponger of the Universe?!? No way!!!

I think we still need to have an actual Champeenship Sponge-Off. This could
be big, and might eventually be an Olympic recognized sport. It's only right
that we start off right. It could be held at the AERC Convention in Reno in
February. This way more of us could see each contender's unique methods and
targeting abilities. 

We could hold it outside on a sidewalk and the contenders could go on an
obstacle course around the block designed by some of the attending ride
managers. Of course, real horses couldn't be used, but the contenders could
use their choice of a)stick horse, b)wonder horse or c)saw horse (the latter
being of a stable sort of temperament). If these choices aren't satisfactory
then I suppose bicycles could be used. Since everybody thinks rivers are too
easy then we could take advantage of natural bodies of water on course plus
some artifical ones to even things out. Mud puddles, snow puddles and the
gutter could be considered natural obstacles and for artificial we could use
orifaces ranging in size from water troughs to 5-gallon buckets to coffee
mugs. Of course we'd need judges at each obstacle. The advantage of having
artificial targets makes it so contenders from all regions can compete
fairly. Surely even desert dwellers can come up with enough water to fill a
coffee mug. For the different size targets contenders could carry different
size sponges. Approach, technique and follow through is all important and an
appropriate point system will have to be developed. For the first few years
we would need to make sure that we get fair rules and regulations developed
for this sport before going to world championships. Then we'd need to make
sure we have a fair way of selecting our teams, etc. These issues will need
to be addressed along with proper prizes.

After the Champeenships then we could all retire indoors to various seminars
put on by the winners. We could set up one of those mechanical horses (umm
bulls) and program it to approximate an endurance horse trot or canter so
that Angie or Lynda could demonstrate their targeting skills and the famous
"wrist snap action" that we've heard so much about. This would also be a
good time for them to show us what they do when their horse spooks because
of a mis thrown sponge. We could program the horse to jump sideways and we
would get to see how they stay on. Of course, the "spook" would be a
surprise to the rider so it would be as realistic as possible. Afterwards,
we could all practice with Angie and Lynda helping us "sponge on the fly"
wannabe's out.

Also this would be great for the sponge holster inventor to appear and also
various sponge and string/rope/elastic companies to show us their wares. 

I see a great future for this sport. So Angie, you will have to WIN your
title, you just can't claim all the glory by declaring yourself the Champeen
of the Universe. It just wouldn't be fair... 

Yes, I'll actually sign my name to this...

Toni Jones & O'Biwon
Central Oregon
tjones@coinet.com