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[RC] Horse Angst - L ginAfter I write this I am going outside , get Rascal out of the pasture of the new place and ride him in the new arena for the first time since we moved. Moved to be near trails after mine got eaten up by developments. He has been off now from real conditioning 2 years +. 3 years since his EPM treatment. Seems 100 % recovered, assuming he had it- really.Barn is only just a shell (hubby takes 3X longer than I think) and everything we owned , equipment wise, has failed since we moved. (I still have to refence the nasty barbwire and high tensile along the 11 acres) I think I have too many horses to care for and work with and DREAD facing this. The old Tb X hunter, eventer race horse, retired to eating us out of house and home with some arthritis, off and on lamness isssues. (but he is very sweet and kind horse. ) 23 My 1/2 arab- 32/34 mare ; double registered Pinto BS.--who is very willing, and smart and pretty- did I say very sensitive has no confidence horse-with about 10 million hours of groundwork, but only about 20 hours under saddle (and 3X had rolling saddle issues- twice with me having to bail). but has always needed a more advanced trainer rider than me. (one of us needed more confidence).Oh and she is about 11 now. The surprise baby now 5 yr old 1/2 arab 1/2 appendix QH. Who I am trying to get to a good trainer (talk about phone tag-trying to visit her place) may go in Jan. if it works out. He was supposed to be started last year at 4. I have only gotten to basic leading, moving away from pressure , despooking and trailer loading with him. He is taller than I like (16 hands) and sometimes has a "who cares" attitude (doesn' want to please like the arabs do) , but isn't spooky and is very curious, and does learn, you just have to suggest the right way.Sometimes I see "sullenness" tendencies. Then my gelding, who I have a good bond with, and have worked thru lots of stuff with-- but has been layed off for a while. Oh, then the abused mini donkey with bad feet. My husband has always disliked the mare and wants me to get rid of her (he has had some prior experience with horses (worked a bit at his sisters hunter /jumpers as barn manager) , but only a beginner/ advanced beginner rider.) He says he wants to ride some . (but I feel like it would be an occasional trail ride-- he travels and not sure he'd really have the time or want to -- to "work with a horse". He is nagging me to get rid of my mare off and on , get the younger horse trained or wanted to ride the older tb. (but he is 240 lb.) The older tb has off and on lamness, soreness (wear and tear issues).The younger horse , even after training won't be 'trail safe " for a while.- I have hung onto the mare and gelding (younger ) cause I didn't know how Rascal would recover..(he is not negotiable)---- But with very HEAVY heart , (my first horses, childhood dream, female sentimentality) I am struggling with , the idea that maybe I should sell, trade or give one of the horses away and get a deadhead suitable for a 240 lb- 53 year old . (NO , can't get rid of husband, had him 27 years ( didn't train him right either, but did the best I could).He sometimes doesn' understand, trying to understand and learn about the horse--- kind of " she's an idiot"- (talking about my mare-instead of understanding she is scared )- He says he wants to ride with me sometimes and wants me to be able to ride, just thinks we have too many and the wrong ones So I realised I may just be selfish and 'stuck in the headlights" and need to grow up and figure out what to do . I really can't train/ride 3 horses and take care of the senior tb ....and work on the place and be a mom to 2 teenage sons...and other responsibilities very well. I really want to ride, do a 100 some day.------ (I even dream of the Tevis before I am 90) Heck, I couldn't read Ridecamp the last couple months--cause I was so overwhelmed with the moving , delays, trying to carve out a horse place------------------- And I sooooooooooooooo want to read Angies book-----------but been afraid to order it ---- Think I will go ride---on my out of shape horse, on my out of shape butt, in my ill fitting saddle --(have been working on that issue too) _________________________________________________________________ Share your latest news with your friends with the Windows Live Spaces friends module. http://clk.atdmt.com/MSN/go/msnnkwsp0070000001msn/direct/01/?href=http://spaces.live.com/spacesapi.aspx?wx_action=create&wx_url=/friends.aspx&mk =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Ridecamp is a service of Endurance Net, http://www.endurance.net. Information, Policy, Disclaimer: http://www.endurance.net/Ridecamp Subscribe/Unsubscribe http://www.endurance.net/ridecamp/logon.asp Ride Long and Ride Safe!! =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=
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