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[RC] What does "bonding" with a horse mean to you? - Jonni

To me, there is a very special bond and relationship that many of us are only lucky to get once or twice in our years with horses. Until you have had this kind of relationship with a horse, it is truly difficult to describe in words for another to understand. I have had one horse that I had this kind of relationship with. From that relationship, I have come to realize a few things. First,  I do not think you can force it to  happen. Clinics can not teach it. It just happens.  When working with the horse,  you work as if you are one unit. It is as if you think about what you want from the horse, and before you ask, they are responding. I also do not think that the horse has to like you. But, they respect and trust you, and what you ask of them.  You trust each other without question or doubt. The communication is often silent, and without detectable cues from someone who may be watching.  This is they highest level of a bond one can have with a horse. Those who have had this kind of relationship with their horses will understand.
 
I think that their are other levels of bonding, that we can achieve with most of our horses. They trust us, do as we ask for the most part, and seem to enjoy our arrival to see them. It is a level of bonding that we CAN force to happen with work. But that true, deep communication as one is not there, and may never be.
 
I am thankful I have had that one very special horse in my life. I'd love to have another like him, but if not, I know I was blessed to have had him in my life. What happens though, is I find I compare my relationships and communication levels with the current horses, to that which I had with him. Of course, it just reminds me how special that bond was. We lost him in 2002. He broke his back in a pasture accident.  He was unable to move his hind legs, and as I held his head in my lap, I saw the anger and fear in his eyes at not being able to get up. I sat there and talked to him. Mostly with my heart and mind. He stopped trying to raise his head in attempts to get up, and somewhat relaxed. The vet gave him that final injection.
 
There is no right or wrong answer as to what bonding is to each individual and their horse. We all have different views, and different levels of to which we feel we are "bonded". I'm bonded with all 5 of ours in different ways, and different levels. But none like that one special horse.
 
Jonni