Geez Angie, you exercised more excuses not to work
out than anyone I know. They wore me out!
Biking is great for those posting quads and landing
glutes. Both in the saddle and on the ground. However, try to maintain some
cellulite for those landings on the ground. Also very cardiovascular if you
try to outride the cars trying to run you off the road. Sometimes the cars will
come on the sidewalk to get you so it is best to ride with off-road tires. This
way, you can swerve off the pavement, into the ditch, ride on the grass until
they pull away, go back down the ditch, get back on the road and signal to the
driver that you are okay. Actually, you can signal to the driver at anytime
because it only takes one finger.
If you want to know what it feels like to "pull
your bellybutton tight to your back" try a gallop through the woods early in the
morning when the banana spiders have their webs across the trails. Each time you
duck and scream, it is worth 100 sit-ups. Unfortunately, if you ride in a
western saddle, it could be worth 100 stiches on your face. OUCH! If you happen
to get one on you, the body contortions you go through to try and get it off
will stretch you out like nobody's business and the screaming is very
cardiovascular. Pilate and yoga don't even compare. However, slapping your
helmet repeatedly while trying to remove the spider will only give you a
concussion. It also makes you look like one of the Three Stooges.
Swimming is also an excellent workout. I like to
play the Jaws theme on the way to the beach and wear flippers so I look like a
fish. Then I imagine starving sharks lurking in the dark, murky water and I
can swim a mile in 1 minute flat. Of course, this is anaerobic exercise and all
the screaming does draw a crowd. "Hee-hee hee, I was only kidding. I thought
something had my leg, but I guess it didn't. I'm okay, really."
Weight training is not just about building muscles,
but gaining strength. Trying to pull a horse into trailer who doesn't know how
to load will do the same thing. (we are talking about exercise here people, not
horsemanship) Trying to hold up a back leg of a full grown Clydesdale who has
never had his feet done works well, also. Especially when they start to kick.
Who-eee, your sweating now! Once you are able to pull a horse into the trailer
or hold the Clydesdale's hoof without letting go or getting tossed into the next
county, your ready for some WWF action. When you grease up those muscles with
hoofprints left all over your body from practice, people just look and say,
"Ooooo, she's bad!"
My favorite workout in the one Ellen DeGenerous
(sp?) subscribes to. She puts on her sweat socks and a pair of Depends. The
sweat socks are really for that "Let's get physical" look. Then she stands out
in the road and her friend drives at her 100 mph and slams on the brakes right
before she hits her! Whew! That'll get the 'ole ticker going. The depends may
not look good with the socks and all, but they work.
The only things you need for a good workout are
dedication, motivation, and a sense of humor. Every time John and I go to
our military class and little Miss Twit barks "On your backs for 150
crunches!" we just laugh....
with tears in our eyes.
I am glad you are feeling better and
thinking about a workout. It's a start. {:)
