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With all of the recent conversation, I felt it important to share this post from another list. PM Subject: [clickryder] Re: It's not trivial : It feels good to sit in front of a computer and do something as normal : as write an email. Like all the rest of you, I've been watching the : terrible images of sorrow that are unfolding via the television. It is : so unbelievably sad; sad to think of the passengers on those planes and : the terror they must have felt; sad to think of the firefighters : climbing to their deaths in those towers as everyone else was rushing : down; sad to think of the families devastated by their losses; sad to : think of the rescue workers forever changed by the nightmare horrors of : what they are seeing. So many images, so many terrible things, but the : saddest of all is thinking about what may be coming. That's the most : frightening part of all of this. What will our reaction be? Will we find : a wise course of action in all this chaos, or will we become just : another terrorists who screams for an eye for an eye? : : Tuesday, when all this was unfolding, (was it only Tuesday? It's hard to : put something as ordinary as a name to that terrible day. Monday we were : an innocent nation, children thinking we were safe and protected. The : rest of the world might be filled with madness, but we considered : ourselves to be an island, safe within our borders. Tuesday our : innocence was blown away. Today we are part of the world. Our actions : matter, and they come home to us, just as they come home to everyone : else.) : : So Tuesday, in the midst of all of this, I had a blacksmith appointment. : I always hold my horses for the farrier, an old habit that developed : years ago with Peregrine's mother. She was a wobbler, and she needed my : help to keep her balance for the farrier. The custom has remained, : though the need is no longer there. It gives me a chance to chat with my : farrier, and to learn more about trimming feet. Usually that's what we : talk about, but on this visit I got a gem about training. My farrier was : telling me about another of his clients, an Indian who lives in the back : woods of Massachusetts. This man was sharing some of his handling : techniques with my farrier, showing him how he asks for a foot. In the : course of their exchange he said: "If you want their cooperation, you : can't hurt them." : : Metaphors, that's what our horses give us. Metaphors and an : understanding of how to get along in the world. "If you want their : cooperation, you can't hurt them." : : When I was little, I used to wonder at the news reports from abroad of : people shouting their hatred of the US. Why were we so hated? I didn't : understand it. We were the nation that sent plane loads of food overseas : to help with famine relief. We were the nation of Peace Corp volunteers. : We were the nation of freedom that others flocked to. Why were we so : hated? When I was six, I remember asking those questions. I couldn't : understand it. I still don't understand it. How can any of us watching : that terrible image of the plane slicing through the World Trade Center : understand this kind of rage? : : I live in a comfortable world. My horses enjoy a lifestyle that would : anger many people. The news is filled with images of people living in : poverty and hunger, crowded into tiny shacks. My horses live a pampered : life. Is this wrong? I don't know. But what I do know is the lessons I : learn from my horses are important. And I know that even small things : matter. What we are doing here on this list, sharing our love of horses : and our interest in clicker training, is not trivial, though when you : look into the faces of the rescue workers, or the families desperate to : find their loved ones, it can at times seem that way. : : The lessons our horses give us are for the tomorrows that are coming. We : need to remember the terrible cost of punishment. We need to understand : that punishment always, always has negative side effects. Let us hope : that those who are making the decisions now, understand that, and : consider those consequences carefully. The effect of punishment is : unpredictable. Let us hope they understand that, as well. : : Our horses teach us that if you choose punishment, timing is everything. : And they teach us that it must be delivered it in a decisive and : effective manner. If you nag away with your punishment, you will : desensitize your horse. That means you'll have to hit your horse harder : the next time, and harder still the time after that to have any effect. : You may reach a point where your horse is so desensitized to pain that : no amount of threat has any effect on him. Ask the owners of aggressive : horses how unpredictable and terrifying their horses are. These horses : have lost their fear. They will charge through any level of pain you can : inflict. : : That's another metaphor for these events. Is that what we have created? : It would seem so. : : Humans want justice. Let us hope we also want solutions. In the days : ahead there will be many voices crying out for vengeance. Those of us : who train horses know that we must not get angry in response to our : horses' outbursts. Instead, we must get very quiet, and very clear. We : must focus on what we want. We must find the one piece of good behavior : in the midst of all their rage, and focus only on that. We must hold a : clear image of what we want to create, and as we do that image will take : over. The rage will turn to interest, and then to cooperation, and : finally to partnership. : : Those of us who have trained difficult horses know this. We understand : the truth of these lessons, and many of us have learned how to translate : them into other areas of our lives. That's why this is not trivial. I : know our country is going to take punitive actions against the : organizers of these terrible acts, but I hope we also remember to focus : on what we ultimately want to create. It is up to us on these lists, : through the internet, through our families and our community groups to : focus on what we want to create. What kind of a world do we want to live : in? As you watch these terrible images flooding into our lives, step : back from all of that. Go stand out in your horse's field. Run your : hands through his mane, and let him tell you that all is well. His : father's grandfather may have died on the battlefields of the Civil War, : an innocent victim of that great tragedy, but he does not want : vengeance. He lives in the now, not the past. Let his lessons help us : shape a future where six year old children do not have to wonder why the : world hates us. : : Alexandra Kurland : theclickercenter.com : : No Mail: clickryder-nomail@yahoogroups.com : ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ : Posts must be edited and in plain text format. : : Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to http://docs.yahoo.com/info/terms/ : : :
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