Ridecamp: [RC] Mt. Carmel ER story

So as I'm lying there in the Emergency Room I'm thinking about just how the 
@#$$ did I get here.  It wasn't supposed to go this way.  I turned my head 
to talk to the nurse and told her that if she would please hurry up with 
the stitches, I could be on my way and possibly get back to ridecamp in 
time to finish.  Apparently they still had to draw blood and do some tests 
before they could dope me up and THEN they could do the stitches in my 
elbow and my face.  They seemed to think something might be broken too 
(like DUH, you mean cuz this bone is sticking out right here?)  I looked 
down and noticed she was preparing to draw blood from the top of my right 
hand and I quickly yanked it out of the way and with an alarmed gasp said 
"what are you doing?".  She grabbed my hand back and said "I'm going to 
take blood from your hand", and while grabbing my hand back said "oh no you 
are not".  She was not amused.  Neither was I.

I said, okay look, that will hurt.  I already hurt here, here, and here 
(pointing to various spots), why not just take blood from one of my two 
arms?  She said she couldn't on the right side because of the puncture thru 
the elbow and they wanted that to get stitched first.  So I said well what 
is wrong with the other arm.  Well, that side is the break.  I don't think 
I was being very cooperative because I didn't see how that should have 
anything to do with it, so instructed her to take the blood from the left 
arm.  Okay fine, the nurse decides to just go along with me, since we 
weren't getting anywhere (but hey, I wasn't going anywhere anytime 
soon).  So then she concludes that she can't take blood from the left arm 
because it would require cutting my shirt off and she said that she didn't 
have any scissors.  I stared blankly at her and said "wait, let me get this 
straight -- we are in a hospital emergency room and YOU DON'T HAVE ANY 
SCISSORS???", and then "and since when do you care about cutting off 
somebody's clothes?".  I told her that it was okay to cut the shirt, since 
the other sleeve had already been cut off, since it had been soaked in 
blood.  So I think I'll live with the other sleeve being cut off, at least 
it will match that way.  Next thing I hear drawers being opened and slammed 
and finally they get a pair of scissors and come cut the sleeve and finally 
get the blood drawn.

The ER doctor finally shows up and I said "what do I have to do to get the 
really good drugs around here???".  I told him that I felt that I had 
already been hurting long enough and would they just please hurry up 
already.  They gave me a shot in the butt.  This was another fun part.  I 
got a different nurse for this.  This one comes in and says "could you 
please just roll over on your side please".  Easy for her to say.  We 
finally managed to get the first shot.  It didn't do very much, and a half 
an hour later I was still not happy, everything still hurt and now my butt 
was sore.  I told them to give me another shot or else I would not stop 
whining, and boy could I whine because I was watching the clock tick away 
and starting to realize that I probably wouldn't get back in time to finish 
the ride.  Damn.  Going to get xrays was also a great experience, almost as 
much fun as the stitches were when the pain killer wasn't working.  I 
really liked hearing comments from my dad like "oh yeah look you can see 
inside her mouth" (from the hole they were stitching closed.  It was almost 
as much fun as hearing them view the xrays and going "oh wow, look at that 
break boy that's really bad".  yeah, great.  Hurry up already, I really 
want to finish this ride today.  That's what I get for having my dad 
there.  The Duck says I got pulled by "Father Option".  Is there a category 
for that?   He was more stressed than I was, and I realized that going back 
and getting on the horse to finish was not up for discussion. :+/  (they 
ended up taking my boots off and hiding them)   The argument that it hurts 
more not getting to finish the ride than anything else didn't seem to get 
very far.  ughhhhh

I did manage to leave there with my sports bra still intact.  I think it 
may have had something to do with my threatening to kill anybody who tried 
to take it off.  It was a good thing that I was able to whine because it 
kept Nurse Ratchet at bay long enough for the pain shots to take effect 
before they got too carried away with trying to scrub the wounds clean.  I 
just love how they are in no hurry to take away your pain but then want to 
flop you around like a glob of dough as soon as you get your shot.

k


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