My, how money flies (just for fun)

["odd farm" <jsalas@tampabay.rr.com>]

As I am just finishing up paying bills and going over the past few months , a few things occur to me. Ever notice how your cash flow coincides with bad luck? For instance, if you are going on a ride far away, for many days, your expenses include, but are not limited to gas, food, health certificates, shoeing and the ride fee itself. That is the ride you will get pulled from. Then when you get home, you may have to call the vet to x-ray a leg. If you couldn't afford to go to the ride, you could gallop your horse down the interstate and end up with nary a bruise or cut. Or maybe you put those expensive aluminum shoes on before the ride (your gonna win this one!) and one is bent when you get there. It cost $120 to have them put on the first time and now you have to pay $60 just to have one reset. I thought for sure this summer I would be able to get something to camp in besides a tent. But no, my trailer has to come up with a bent axle that can only be replaced with a Featherlite axle. How about the times when you have a little money to play with after paying bills but you realize the other animals on your farm are due for yearly check ups. We all have dogs or cats or some other critters if we have horses. OK, so I take the dogs in and spend the $500 stinking dollars so they will live another year. Oh but then, I have to go back 2 days later because the dogs get frisky, and one bites the other in the neck. I hear the dreaded words from my daughter "Mom! Hurry up, dad needs you!!". Dad doesn't do well with animal injuries. So I take the dog back to the vet. The receptionist cheerily comments, "Mrs. Salas, you were just here." (of course she is not so cheery after she breaks her back trying to lift my folder full of our records to the desk) I reply "Of course I was dear, but I didn't spend enough money. How much can I give you today?" One week later, the stitches come out, the dog gets into a fight with a opossum and the opossum wins. The stupid dog split his neck open and cuts his leg. Crap. I just bought a Myler bit thinking I was done donating to the vet. So, I perform the surgery myself with my daughter's assistance. We scrub up and pull out the tools. Butterfly strips, Teflon pads, Vetrap and duct tape. Total cost: $12.99. When the duct tape falls off, the cuts are healed. Of course, the scar is not perfect but our dogs look like quilts any way. We should have named them all "Patches". We have a sign hanging over the drive way that reads "One old dog, one young dog, several stupid dogs. Please drive slowly"  We mean it. When we bred our mare, we used a very expensive stallion thinking (ignorantly) that was all we would have to spend to get the perfect endurance baby. After 3 tries with my local vet and a trip to Gainesville and another couple of thousand dollars, WHALA! The perfect baby. The name we gave him is  Juan's Corona Bey  but we call him "Mucho Dinero". Perfect. I guess when you think about it, there is no reason to keep any extra money. If you donate money monthly to all the businesses you use for your horse stuff, farm, and transportation and keep your vets on a retainer, it won't hurt so much when you have to use them. Listen, they have to make a living, too. Why should they be poor just because we are?? Lisa Salas, The Odd fArm  Dad carries no cash as wife, kids and animals have bled him dry.