>
> Good Afternoon.
> I AM a horse-aholic. I would like to welcome all of you to this
> month's meeting of Horse-aholic Anonymous.
> Some of you are here tonight because a friend or relative brought
you.
> You may be sitting here thinking that you are OK and don't really
need
> any help. It is not easy to admit that you are a horse-aholic
and it is
> even harder to bring yourself to a HA meeting for help. HA is
here to
> assist
> you.
> I have some questions to ask. If you can answer YES to more than
three
> of
> the following, you have come to the right place.
> 1. Can you say "sheath" in public without blushing?
> 2. Do you drive a big truck with a towing package when everyone
else
> drives a real car?
> 3. Do you have more than one vehicle? One for you and one for
the
> horses?
> 4. Do you spend your holidays going to shows, clinics and seminars
when
> everyone else goes on a cruise?
> 5. If you do go overseas, is it to a riding vacation in Ireland
or to
> Spruce Meadows to watch the Grand Prix?
> 6. Do you discuss things at the dinner table that would make
most
> doctors leave in disgust?
> 7. Do you consider formal wear to be clean jeans and freshly
scraped
> boots?
> 8. Is your interior decorator State Line Tack?
> 9. Was your furniture and carpeting chosen with your horses in
mind?
> 10. Are your end tables really tack trunks with tablecloths thrown
over
> them?
> 11. Do you know the meaning of _____________?
> 12. Is your mail made up primarily of horse catalogs and horse
magazines
> ?
> 13. Do you get up before dawn to ride? Go to horse shows? Clinics?
[but
> have trouble getting up for "work?"]
> 14. If you do have dresses, do they all have pockets? Do those
pockets
> often
> contain bits of carrot, hay, or sweet feed?
> 15. When you meet a new person do you always ask them what kind
of horse
> they have and pity them if they don't have one?
> 16. Do you remember the name of their horse sooner than you remember
> their name?
> 17. Do you find non-horse people boring?
> If you answered YES to one of the above, there is still hope.
If you
> answered YES to two, you are in serious trouble.
> My advice to all of you with three or more YES's is to sit back
and
> smile, turn to the smiling person next to you, and know that
your life
> will always be filled with good friends and good horses and it
will
> never be boring.
> *Author Unknown*
