You thought those 6th graders were funny?

["superpat" <superpat@gateway.net>]

Subject:  These are actual quotes. Un huh...they really did say it.
GREAT THINKERS OF OUR TIME!?

1. Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live
forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we
would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not
live forever."
---Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest

2. "Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world,
I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that but not with
all those flies and death and stuff."  ---Mariah Carey

3. "Researchers have discovered that chocolate produces some of the
same reactions in the brain as marijuana. The researchers also discovered
other
similarities between the two, but can't remember what they are."
---Matt Lauer on NBC's Today Show, August 22

4. "I haven't committed a crime. What I did was fail to comply with the
law."
---David Dinkins, New York City May! on answering accusations that he
failed to pay his taxes.

5. "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost a very important part of
your life."
---Brooke Shields, during an interview to become spokesperson for a  federal
anti-smoking campaign.

6. "I've never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body."
---Winston Bennett, Univ. of KY basketball forward

7. "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in
the country."
 ---Mayor Marion Barry, Washington, DC

8. "We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees."
 ---Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks

9. "I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through our papers.
We are the president."  ---Hillary Clinton commenting on the release of
subpoenaed documents.

10. "China is a big country, inhabited by many Chinese."-
--Former French President Charles De Gaulle

11. "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death by a
jackass, and I'm just the one to do it."  A Congressional Candidate in Texas

12. "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the
impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
--- U. S.Vice-President Gore

13. "Without censorship, things can get terribly confused in the public
mind."
---General William Westmoreland



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