On the subject on scientific discussion:

RUN4BEAR@aol.com
Thu, 12 Dec 1996 09:55:52 -0500

The heaviest element known to science was recently discovered by
physicists at Washington State University. The element, tentively
called Administratium, has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic
number of 0. However, it does have one neutron, 15 assistant neutrons, 70
vice neutrons and 161 assistant vice neutrons. This gives it an atomic
mass of 247. These 247 particles are held together in a nucleus by a
force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles
called "morons".

Since it has no electrons, Administratium is inert. However, it can be
detected chemically as it impedes every reaction it comes into contact
with. According to WSU, a minute amount of Administratium added to one
reaction caused it to take over four days to complete. Without the
Administratium, the reaction ordinarily occurred in less than one second.

It has been observed that Administratium has a normal half life of
approximately three years, at which time it does not actually decay but
instead undergoes a reorganization in which assistant neutrons, vice
neutrons, and assistat vice neutrons exchange places. Studies seem to
show the atomic number actually increases after each reorganization.

Research indicates that Administratium occurs naturally in the atmosphere.
It tends to concentrate in certain locations such as government agencies,
large corporations, and universities. It can usually be easily found in
the newest, best-appointed and best-maintained buildings.

Scientists at WSU warn that Administratium is known to be toxic, and
recommend plenty of fluids and bed rest after even low levels of exposure.
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