redneck engineering exam

[Bette Lamore <woa@stormnet.com>]

Hey Howard
Couldn't resist. Here's one for you! <BG>
Bette
 Redneck Engineering Exam

 1. Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree
 that will support a 10 lb. possum.

 2. Which of the following cars will rust out the quickest
 when placed on blocks in your front yard?
 A) 66 Ford Fairlane
 B) 69 Chevrolet Chevelle
 C) 64 Pontiac GTO

 3. If your uncle builds a still that operates at a capacity
 of 20 gallons of shine per hour, how many car radiators
 are necessary to condense the product?

 4. A pulpwood cutter has a chain saw that operates at 2700 rpm.
 The density of the pine trees in a plot to be harvested is
 470 per acre. The plot is 2.3 acres in size. The average
 tree diameter is 14 inches. How many Pabst Blue Ribbons
 will be consumed in cutting the trees?

 5. If every old refrigerator in the state vented its charge
 of R-12 simultaneously, what would be the decrease in the
 ozone layer?

 6. A front porch is constructed of 2x8 pine on 24 inch centers
 with a field rock foundation. The span is 8 feet and the
 porch length is 16 feet. The porch floor is 1 inch rough
 sawn pine. When the porch collapses, how many hound dogs
 will be killed?

 7. A man owns a house and 3.7 acres of land in a hollow with
 an average slope of 15%. The man has 5 children. Can each
 of the children place a mobile home on the man's land?

 8. A 2 ton pulpwood truck is overloaded and proceeding down
 a steep grade on a secondary road at 45 mph. The brakes
 fail. Given the average traffic loading of secondary roads,
 how many people will swerve to avoid the truck before it
 crashes at the bottom of the mountain?

 For extra credit, how many of the vehicles that swerved
 will have mufflers and uncracked windshields?

 9. A coal mine operates as an NFPA Class 1, Division 2
 Hazardous Area. The mine employs 120 miners per shift. A
 gas warning is issued at the beginning of 3rd shift. How
 many cartons of unfiltered Camels will be smoked during
 the shift?

 10. How many generations will it take before cattle develop
 two legs shorter than the others because of grazing along
 a mountain side?


-- 
Bette Lamore
Whispering Oaks Arabians, Home of TLA Halynov
http://www.stormnet.com/~woa
I've learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper, the closer it
gets to the end, the faster it goes. Smell the roses!