Re: RC: I can better that!

[Lif Strand <fasterhorses@gilanet.com>]

At 11:10 PM 12/25/00, you wrote:
>I stepped out of the shower this morning to hear a
>knock-knock-knocking on (heaven's) my front door, and what to my
>wondering eyes do appear but two little ladies saying "We're here (NOT
>with the beer!) ... to push our religion on you!" -- In reality, they
>were doing marketing of Watchtower - and a bible.  I was not happy

First mistake, Karen - you probably put on a bathrobe or something after 
stepping out of the shower.  If you had appeared nekkid, the ladies 
probably would have left right away.

Second mistake is that you didn't have your OWN literature to give them 
right by the door.  AERC brochures, copies of great endurance articles, a 
membership application, endurance gear catalogs.  You should have grabbed 
the Watchtowers right out of their hands and then immediately started 
telling them about endurance riding, without pausing for breath or letting 
them get a word in edgewise.

Third of all, next time you should use a Paul Strand Proven Religious 
Invasion Repellant Technique (PSPRIRT of course) trade marked, patented, 
copyrighted.  True story follows.

When I had just started dating Paul, he described to me an encounter he had 
had with Watchtower pushers (please excuse the terminology, but these 
people use the same technique as street drug pushers).  He had been 
partying the night before and he wasn't a happy camper that morning when he 
heard someone marching up the 53 steps to his apartment (I counted those 
stairs when I moved in and started hauling groceries and laundry baskets up 
them).  He peered out the window and armed himself appropriately.

Paul threw the door open at the first knock.  He stood there, barefoot and 
shirtless, 6 pack under his arm, grizzly with a couple day's beard, peering 
at the shocked Watchtower folks with those famous bloodshot eyes that, as 
he would put it, felt like two pissholes in a snow bank.

Before either of the poor suckers could say a word, Paul growled at them 
"What day do you people go to church?"

Stunned, neither of them answered.

Paul growled again "Well, tell you what, this is Sunday and it is my church 
day and this is my way of worshiping and here you are, uninvited.  So when 
your next church day comes around, I guess you won't mind when I come to 
visit you with a 6 pack of beer and get you to help me worship".

The Watchtower folks left.  We lived in that apartment for another year and 
a half and nary a one ever showed up again.


Lif Strand
Quemado NM  USA
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