Dead Horse

[Katherine Whitby <Lonehorse@compuserve.com>]

To the owner of the dead paint horse in Browns Valley Calif( and to all
horse owners and not horse owners) As I came around the corner I didn't
even see it. It was pitch black out, early in the morning.  I saw something
black off to my left side and then something hit my truck.  I slammed on my
brakes, and backed into the driveway of the feed store.  Whatever it was ,
it was still there.  There was an oncoming car in the lane I wanted to go
in.  I didn't want to risk a worse accident and panicked I needed to warn
him, so I flashed my lights off and on and hoped he would get the message. 
As he passed I turned onto the road and there was no one.  My lights caught
a horse down in the road and I pulled in front of him.  I could see he was
injured.  With my hands shaking furiously, my heart beating so hard I
thought it would bruise me, I found my phone and called 911.  They told me
to stay in the car until the police came but by then I had opened the door
and made way to the horse.  I became hysterical, so hysterical that even
911 hung up on me.  You see, its entire side was ripped open , its back leg
snapped completely in half with the bone sticking up in the air.  I
remember seeing the bone marrow, thinking , that is about how big I
pictured it to be.  The worse thing was it was still alive.....I became
even more hysterical, screaming, crying, yelling, and I never woke up a
soul, that I know of.  All I could do is bend over, stroke its blood
stained face, and say i'm sorry, i'm so sorry, and trying to fathom its
pain I almost fainted.  A car drove by and running up to him asking him if
he had a gun, the horse was still alive, but by the time the retired cop
made way it took its last breath, which I wish had happened the 5 or 10
minutes ago.  Looking at all the debris on the road I figured I had hit him
harder than I thought, and really trashed my truck.  Until I picked up a
peice of debris and it wasn't the color of my car.  Walking over to my
truck I barely grazed the left front.  The guy who hit him, came back after
a while, stating his car had crapped out on him and it was trashed and
admitted he hit the horse.  It didn't make me feel any better.  I should
have gone home but I continued on to work.  As a registered nurse I made my
first medication error in my 20 year career.  I was lucky it was diarrhea
medicine.  I dragged myself to your house after work to say how sorry I was
but nobody answered the door.  When I pulled up the the tarp covered horse
at the end of the driveway, I apologized again and said goodbye for good. 
I said hello to it on the way to work everyday, and now I drive by the
large dried bloody spot on the road everyday.  I could not sleep at night,
and could not get the horse out of my mind.  I made another medication
error at work and told my boss I would not be back for a short while, after
I obvously recover.  You see, I have 3 horses of my own.  I am an animal
freak and lover.  And I wanted to let you know that I am sorry for your
loss.