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RC: Re: Not much Confidence



Denise,

I know exactly how you feel!  I bought a horse last January
after 3 years away from horses.  I wanted to do a lot of
trail riding with him and try endurance.  By May I knew we
had some major problems but I didn't want to give up too
easily.  By August I felt sick every day as I drove to the
barn, and half the time cried most of the way home.  It was
time to make a change!  I made some mistakes with this
gelding, and it was also a bad personality match.  I'm as
spooky as any horse you'll ever meet (huge startle reflex)
and this guy was even more sensitive than me.  I sent him to
a trainer to sell for me (I was still attached to him!), it
only took a month.  I started shopping for another horse,
much wiser about what to look for.  I found a really nice
mare, a 6 year old Quarter Horse.  She's not a super
endurance prospect but it was far more important for me to
have a horse that was fun for me to ride every day at home.
If I can add some competitions later that's great.  And if
not -- I still have a fun horse to ride!  This mare and I
have really clicked together, I just love her.

My confidence took a real beating with my other gelding.  I
bought my mare in November and for the first 2 weeks I was
waiting for her to spook and shy every time I rode.  I was
so tense my hair hurt!!  Bless her heart, she just ignored
me and I've made great progress.  We're not going out on the
trail alone yet, but we have gone out twice with some other
people.  By the time we have better weather (at the moment
it's either knee deep mud or the deep freeze) I think I'll
be ready to hit the trails.  One other change I made was to
get help.  I found an instructor that I liked and started
taking lessons as soon as I brought my new horse to my barn.
I guess if I ever do grow up I won't need so much
supervision!!

I'm still going to pursue endurance with this horse.  She'll
do LD just fine, and  hopefully slow 50's.  She's not as
heavily muscled as some Quarter Horses so who knows, we
might even do a 100 some day.  As I said though, the very
most important thing was that I found a horse that was right
for me.  I agree with Angie 100% -- you can find the right
horse and go straight to the good stuff!  The hardest thing
for me was to realize that I was not the best owner for my
gelding and that selling him did not mean I failed, or that
he failed either.  We just weren't right for each other.
His new owner just loves him.  If you really, really want to
keep Cayenne, find someone to help you.  Then you can sort
out what are your problem areas and what are the horses, and
how to work through them.

Best of luck --
SusanB and Cricket
in freezing northern VA


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